When I was younger, someone who had hurt me was sharing a message. In my anger, I was about to get up and leave. My best friend stopped me. She urged me to stay. That was one of the wisest advice I’ve ever received.
When Jesus said to turn the other cheek, I used to think He wants us to be a doormat. Then I thought, maybe He wants us to be the bigger person. But how unsatisfying! How unjust. Unfair.
When we’re right, there’s a passion inside that flares up and makes even the meekest person speak up and do something. I don’t claim to be meek, but as an INFP, I don’t like confrontations. That night though, anger and teenage hormones made a lethal combination. I felt like the other person was being a hypocrite so I had every right to leave.
When my best friend told me to stand down, I was more frozen in place than wise enough to take her advice because she’s the tough one. She stands up for her friends and family. She doesn’t put up with anybody’s drama. So why did she hold me back?
Because sometimes it’s harder to stay still and be quiet. It’s harder to turn the other cheek.
Ephesians 4:26-28 (NIV) says:
26 “In your anger do not sin” Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.
In learning to let go of anger and grudges, I learned that the longer I had held onto to those things, the more I stole from myself. I robbed myself of peace and joy. I stole my own happiness and blocked my own path to growth and maturity.
My best friend telling me to stay was a step toward learning to let go of the anger. I learned to stop stealing from myself, and instead work toward my own healing and joy. I worked my way to forgiveness so that I can write these words. So I can share my story with those who need to hear it, with those who need to let go of anger and work their way toward healing.
Ephesians 4 go on to say:
29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
These verses remind me of when Jesus healed Malchus’ ear (John 18:10-11, Luke 22:50-51). Malchus was a servant of the High Priest Caiaphas, and he was involved in the arrest of Jesus. Peter, in an attempt to prevent this arrest, drew a sword and cut of Malchus’ ear. Jesus chastised Peter and healed Malchus.
Jesus turned the other cheek, and in doing so, restored a man. Turning the other cheek isn’t being a doormat and it’s not simply being a bigger person. It is actively being kind and compassionate. It is actively letting go of the bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, and malice in order to actively forgive those who wronged you.
[bctt tweet=”Turning the other cheek is finding the broken and restoring them to God. #loveothers”]
Turning the other cheek is like Jesus turning away from what Peter’s violence to find the broken man with the broken ear and heal him. When we turn the other cheek, we look around for the brokenness and find ways to bring healing and restoration to those who wronged us. People who hurt others have been hurt themselves, and they’re the ones who really need God’s love and healing.
Oh trust me, it’s not an easy position to be in because it’s not simply being a pacifist. It’s crossing the line to heal those who never asked for your healing. It’s loving the people who refuse to accept your love. It’s forgiving those who don’t think they need forgiveness. It’s being kind to the unjust. It’s stepping into the snake pit, being bitten over and over, and yet persevering to reach and save the person trapped inside.
Turning the other cheek is opening your heart to others, and that means being vulnerable to be hurt. That’s one of the hardest things we can do, but that’s what Jesus did.
