As fun and funny children can be, I learned that being in a ministry is no joke. It’s is hard work and you learn a lot. Hindsight is always 20/20, isn’t it? Here are the last 4 things I wish I knew before joining the ministry. You can read the first 3 here and the second 3 here.
7. People will leave.
It’s a fact. We are surrounded by people who change (including ourselves). They serve alongside us in the ministry. They can be the most dedicated and committed people. Yet their lives change and they can leave. Likewise, our lives can change and we can leave.
People leave for all sorts of reason. Some because of life changes, while others because of anger, misunderstanding, and unresolved disputes. These hurt and can feel very personal. This might sound cliched, but the best reaction is to turn to God.
When people leave, we might get hurt from unresolved issues or panic because we’re short-staffed. We might be confused, angry, or unsure. At the end of it all, when the smoke clears and dust settles, there’s nothing we can do except turn to God.
I never liked the “get over it” advice, and I know what I’m saying sounds like it. People leave. There’s nothing you can do. Get over it. But don’t get over it. “Get over it” sounds harsh, like your feelings don’t matter. They do matter, but prolonging your stay in the negativity of anger or confusion is not good. It can cripple you as it did me.
We have an understanding God who is always with us. Turn to Him. Lay out all you’re going through with Him. Only through God can we “get over it” in a healthy moving-forward kind of way.
8. Say No.
Learn to prioritize and say no to the things that don’t make the cut. People might approach you for a favor, for help, or for you to step into another leadership position. It can be hard to say no, especially to your brothers and sisters in Christ, to people who you consider family or are in fact, family. Yet it’s one of the most important lessons we need to learn.
We can’t do our best in anything if we’re spread too thin. Listen to who you are. Know your limits. Know what you’re really passionate about. Cut out things that drain you. Step away from things that aren’t working with where you are in life.
Sometimes we’ll need to say no to new opportunities. Sometimes we’ll need to say no by letting go of something we’ve been doing. Don’t worry about what will happen. God will provide the right people to get His work done, just as He provided us to the specific ministry He wants us in.
9. Stand Your Ground
There are people who will try to change things about your ministry like the way you do things or your vision, mission or goals. And some of those people are well-meaning people. They have the best intentions for you and the ministry.
Here’s the deal: unless what you’re doing is in disunity with your church and senior pastor, stand your ground.
First, be in unity with the vision, mission, and goals of your church and senior pastor. Your ministry is not a church on its own. It’s not it’s own entity or organization. It is part of a bigger whole. It is part of a body. As one foot can’t go the opposite direction of the other foot, so can’t your ministry go on a different direction of the church. If it is, it’s creating disunity and problems, and I’m sure that is not the will of God for a church.
That said, stand your ground. I’ve listened to people about how to do things in the ministry or the direction it should go in. Disastrous results. We lost kids. They stopped attending because they felt discouraged. This is one of my biggest regrets, and as it happened…as I listened…my gut was churning and screaming no! no! no!
There will be moments when you need to stand your ground. You would know when. Your gut would clench. Your heart would lurch. Your spirit would bounce around, trying to catch your attention. You might feel alone. It might feel very easy to give in.
Don’t give in. Stand your ground. If you’re unsure, “Let me pray about it,” is a great response. Then take the time and pray. And if you need to stand your ground, take the strength Jesus offers and follow God’s directions only.
10. It’s Worth It.
There were times in the ministry when I would feel down. When a lot of things piled up and I struggled. Then our good God would give me a moment that puts it all in perspective.
One of those moments was when I taught the Preschool Sunday school class. At the end tail of class, the kids and I were just talking when one boy asked how Jesus can be in his heart. I tried not to cry while I led them all in a prayer. Perspective.
All the mess. All the headaches. All the money spent. All the time used up. All the people who stayed and left. All the times of hurt. All the times of encouragement. They’re all worth it because we do it for God, and working for God is absolutely worth it.
What about you? What are some lessons you’ve learned by being in the ministry?
Linking up with Testimony Tuesday.
