How do you de-stress/take care of yourself?
I am a huge believer in self care, both the little things you do everyday to de-stress and the bigger things you do to step back from it all and create white space in your life. So here are 3 little things and 3 big things I do to take care of myself.
3 Little Things
Read fiction or watch a movie. I escape to a new world through the imagination.
DIY Pamper Night with face masks or doing my own mani-pedi, usually while watching a romantic comedy or “Pride and Prejudice” with Keira Knightley. Top tip: Do your fingernails after you wash off your face mask or you’re stuck with a stiff face for about an hour or two.
Change in scenery. I hop in the car and drive a few extra minutes to get away from the blurring familiar. It creates breathing room and new perspectives.
3 Big Things
Here’s what I learned. When you’re burned out, as in you crossed that line, doing any little or big thing to de-stress is not going to help. You need professional help or a massive big thing, like a major stepping back from it all to reevaluate and rebuild your life. Once the line is crossed, these practices are like bandaids on a bullet wound. They won’t help. Please speak with your doctor or a counselor. But if you haven’t crossed that line, one big thing can help in a big way. I do these 3 big things at least once a year.
Check off a travel destination. Some people travel to the same place every year, which works for them. Sometimes, visiting that same one place every year becomes a chore. It would defeat the purpose of a vacation. So list places you want to visit and start checking them off. If you try to check off one place once a year, you have plenty of time to plan and save.
Also, figure out the kind of traveler you are. Have you ever come back from vacation exhausted? That’s because you tried to do as much things as you can in so little time. I adopted the idea of coming back. That way, I don’t try to cram in as much sights as I can. Maybe I will return or maybe I won’t. I don’t know what lies in the future or what deals I may come across. The possibility of returning is there, and it helps me actually turn the vacation into a vacation.
Say “no.” One of the ways I say no is to edit my social media “friends.” We bought into the idea that we need as many friends and followers as possible, especially if part of our business is being connected online (having an online presence). But the trade-off to being so connected is allowing so much noise into our lives.
Take Facebook, for example. Facebook made me realize how many people I actually know, as well as how many people I actually know and who actually knows me. Having an online presence may be necessary, but it doesn’t have to control me. I can turn off the noise from certain people. I can block the negative. I control what I let inside my life.
What creates noise in your life? Say no to that noise by un-friending or un-following those people. Trust me, it’s okay to do that. It’s even okay to just delete your profile if the network doesn’t work for your life anymore.
Turn to Jesus. Shouldn’t this be an everyday thing? Yeah, it is (or it should be), but how often we turn to Jesus doesn’t diminish the fact that’s it’s a big thing to turn to Jesus. Here’s the blatant truth. I don’t spend intentional time with God everyday. You know, that devotional thing. I don’t even read my Bible everyday. I don’t meditate on His Word. I don’t pray everyday. At least, not the kind of prayer that gets people labeled as prayer warriors. Definitely not the kind of “War Room” prayer praying. Horrible, right?
I do try, but I’ve long let go of the guilt from failing to do any that. A classmate once asked me if I was a “prayer warrior,” and I said no because I wasn’t, and I wasn’t because I was a rebellious little punk. I still wouldn’t call myself a prayer warrior today, but it’s because I’m not the “War Room” prayer kind of praying person.
Instead, I pray where I pray, when I pray, how I pray. In the bathroom with a prayer journal. In my car in a dark parking lot. As I fall asleep. As I do my morning routines. As I garden. As I sit in Starbucks. Oh, did you know God can speak to you inside a Starbucks?!? And you’ll cry and people look at you weird or try to ignore you. And you’ll try to hide it until you give up trying because apparently, the Holy Spirit doesn’t care where you pray, when you pray, and how you pray. Apparently, God can touch you wherever you are because limiting Him inside four walls or within certain hours just doesn’t work on Him. Did you know???
🙂
But there are ways to step back and focus on spending time with God, like going on a retreat. It doesn’t even have to be an official retreat with your church or an organization. It can be your own staycation retreat: book a room in a hotel or AirBnB by a lake or the beach. Leave your laptop at home. Bring a Bible, a journal, some worship music, and queued up podcasts from pastors or Christian speakers.
You can fast – taking the time you spend on one thing (eating or social media) and using it to spend time with God through prayer or reading and meditating on the Word of God – during certain seasons of the year (like January, around Easter, or Lent).
Or do what I do if you’re not a prayer warrior. Turn your heart over to God. There may be days when I read one Bible verse in a rush or only say one-liner prayers, but I pause everyday and give it all up to God. However that looks: in the middle of traffic, when I want to scream my head off, late at night trying to sleep, in the shower. I pause, realize that my heart is full, and turn it over to God. He wants our hearts, after all.
